So, you’ve been working for over six months and things are going well. The office is a bit beige but hey it could be worse, we all remember the summer job at the chicken plucking factory, right!
Things are cool at home too, boyfriend/girlfriend still fairly attractive, and entertaining, despite the horrendous laughter moment at that comedy night but hey, there are certainly worse character traits to have.
Then something happens to flip your world upside down! It shouldn’t be irritating but it slowly begins to grate and then it grows into an all-consuming bulbous cyst of an issue!
That’s right your ‘best’ (rabbit ears necessary) friend has decided to go on a gap year program – aarrrrrggghhh!!! How could they, and without you?! This is a travesty on so many levels.
What’s wrong with them? Why do they feel the need to do volunteer work or scrub elephant bottoms – for fun?!
Yes, they asked you to go too but you’d just started that new job and things were going pretty well with boyfriend/girlfriend and it was about time you began to put some money away for a mortgage – ouch!
You don’t want to be jealous and you want to look longingly at their photos from Southeast Asia but all you can do is silently seethe and present an outer exterior that says ‘oh good, my ‘best’ friend has just gone paragliding in Borneo’ – cue maniacal laughter, worse than the comedy night incident – much worse!
So when did it happen? When did you first notice the symptoms? Can you even bring yourself to say it?
‘My name is <your name here> and I have gap year envy’.
Well done you – big round of applause and sympathetic smiles.
If you think you might have gap year envy, or the thought of volunteer work abroad fills you with a nagging desire, then check out the list below as maybe, just maybe, it might be time for you to do something about it.
Top ten signs that you have gap year envy
- Bounties and Tropical Lilt have started to bring you out in a rash.
- You’ve changed your screen saver from palm-fringed beach to drizzly Lake District.
- You smugly enjoy longer, hotter showers knowing that your ‘friend’ travelling in Tanzania probably hasn’t had one for a week.
- You return your brand new £12 pair of Havana flip-flops as the thong arrangement is far too uncomfortable.
- You can’t go on the Tube as the Mind the Gap announcement makes you curl up into a little ball.
- Every time a plane flies overhead you fall to your knees and scream: ‘WHYYYYYYY!’
- You refer to Leonardo DiCaprio as ‘that bloke that was in that film’.
- A menu for a new Indonesian restaurant comes through your door forcing you to put up a poster saying ‘no junk mail’.
- At night you turn your phone to silent just in case you get another text about eating coconuts on white-sand beaches.
- At the office your boss asks if there are any volunteers available to help move some boxes and you scream ‘what is it with you do-gooders!’ before running out and hiding in the toilets.
Don’t worry, weary non-traveller, you are not alone.
Gap year programs and volunteer work holidays, for envious ex-best mates, are prevalent and no matter what stage of life you finally decide to take the plunge there’s help out there for you.
So, the next time you consider striking a bare-footed hippy who has lost their way on the city streets – stop!
Take a deep breath and count to ten because remember they’re not bad people, and one day, on a tropical island paradise or stunning ice-capped peak you just might be sending a cheeky text to the folks back home, just to make them jealous.
Author bio: Chris is a traveller with past gap year envy and now has a passion for conquering challenges the world has to offer.
